Every Sunday, my 20-month-old daughter and I call Grandma and Grandpa to video chat. We live in Colorado; they live in Las Vegas. But my daughter knows them by sight and voice—because, with instant messaging (IM) and a webcam, we all can see and hear one another. It feels as if they are right here with us, and it’s great to chat for free.

These days, webcams are easy to buy, connect, and use. In fact, most new laptops come with built-in webcams, and when a webcam is paired with instant messaging or video call software or websites, almost anyone can communicate face to face (or webcam to webcam!) with friends and loved ones.

In this article, we discuss both of these options for staying in touch with family and friends.
Get the software and hardware

Here is what you need to get started:
Instant messaging software: Windows Live Messenger

There are lots of free programs that you can use to stay in touch, but my favorite software for instant messaging and video calls is Windows Live Messenger, which is a part of Windows Live Essentials. With Windows Live Essentials, you get Messenger, Photo Gallery, Mail, Movie Maker, Writer, Family Safety, and Toolbar, plus Microsoft Office Outlook Connector, Office Live Add-in, and Microsoft Silverlight.

Here are five reasons I use Windows Live Messenger instead of other instant messaging software:

It’s integrated with other Microsoft products and services, like Microsoft Outlook and Windows Live Essentials, so I can see when my friends and family are online as I do other things.

Most people I know use it (300 million people in 76 countries use Messenger every month), plus I can chat with people on Yahoo! too.

Messenger offers video chat in HD while sharing your photos and watching videos.

You can leave 30-second video messages if your friends aren’t around.

Also, you can set your availability by group. For instance, you can be “Available” for friends but “Offline” for coworkers.

There are lots of other features, but these five are the ones that I use most often to stay in touch. Also, Windows Live Messenger is easy to set up, which makes it simple for me to use with other people who are less technically savvy.

To get it, download Windows Live Messenger from Microsoft. After you’re on the website, click Download, and, in the File Download dialog box, click Run and then follow the installation prompts.
Webcam

The next item you’ll need is a webcam. Choose something that will work with your computer and operating system. Ideally, you should get one with a built-in microphone. Laptops often have built-in webcams, by the way, but if you purchase one on your own, you’ll need to plug the webcam into a USB port on your computer and install the software that comes with it. Then, follow the instructions that come with your webcam to install it on your computer. An external webcam provides a lot of flexibility with camera angle and direction, better optics, increased field of view, and typically higher quality video. For a list of webcams that are optimized for Windows Live, visit the Windows Live marketplace.
Add friends to your Windows Live Messenger account

After you have the messaging software and your webcam is set up, you can start video chatting with friends and family. When you are signed in to your Windows Live Messenger account, it’s time to add friends that you’d like to chat or video chat with. Look for the Friends icon on your Messenger home screen Friends icon in Windows Live Messenger, and on the drop-down menu, click Add a friend. All you need to do is add his or her email address and then click Next twice. The second time you click Next, you are asked whether you’d like to add the person as a favorite, which means that he or she will always appear at the top of your Messenger contacts and will be easy to find. Then, an invitation is sent.
Add a Contact window in Windows Live Messenger

You can easily add friends and contacts to your Windows Live Messenger account.

After your friend accepts the invitation, the two of you can begin chatting. When you’re ready to start an IM or video chat, just double-click the contact name and another window will open with options to IM or to Video call. To have an IM conversation, type your message in the text box provided, and, on your keyboard, press Enter. To have a video chat, click Video call. Note that the other person must be online and available to have an IM conversation or video chat.

Make a call with your webcam

Making a webcam call (or chat with video) is as easy as making a call from the telephone in your kitchen. The big difference is that you’re using your computer with a webcam to make the call. Here’s how it works: Your computer calls another computer using the IP (Internet Protocol) address associated with your contact’s email address. To read more about making a webcam call, go to Windows Live Help, and, in the Search for box, type webcam call. For more information about buying a webcam that is optimized for Windows Live, visit Windows Live marketplace.
Screen shot: How to start a webcam call

Chat during video calls

When you are engaged in a video chat using Windows Live Messenger, you can still send instant messages back and forth, if, for example, your sound goes out or another small technical problem occurs. You can also send or share pictures or documents while you video chat.

You can even IM with other friends while you are video chatting—just open up a chat with anyone else on your contact list and multitask to your heart’s content. The person you’re chatting with will never know that you are also on a video call, but be careful: The person on the video call will see what you’re doing and where your eyes are.
Video and IM tips

With instant messaging, it’s easy to overdo it. Little messages pop up on your screen at the oddest times, and it’s difficult to resist them even when a work deadline or other important task needs to be completed. If you have a lot of people in your contacts list, you could spend half your day instant messaging. To help you stay on track and in touch, here are some instant messaging tips:

Use the My Status feature to alert others to your availability. This feature tells others at a glance whether you can chat or whether it might not be a good time for you. Conversely, respect the status of those you want to chat with. If someone has the Busy icon on their name, for example, don’t bother sending a message until they become available. To set your status in Windows Live Messenger, go to the File menu, click Status, and then select the option that describes your current availability: Available, Busy, Away, or Appear Offline.

Screen shot of an IM conversation showing one contact offline

Establish regular times for video calls. You can always be spontaneous, of course, but remember that some folks wear pajamas half the day and may not always want to pick up a video call!

Regularly check the video settings for your webcam. First, check your video settings in Windows Live Messenger: Go to the Tools menu, and click Audio and Video Setup. When you click Next to get to the webcam settings, you should see yourself in the window. (If you don’t, in My Computer, check your webcam properties to make sure that you have set up your webcam properly.) Adjust the brightness, contrast, and other camera settings by using the sliding arrow.

Staying in touch with family and friends is actually a lot of fun when you use instant messaging and video. With the way people are scattered around the country—and even around the globe—these days, it’s also a very practical way to communicate.